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Spirituality – the Message – Day 41



I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to give value to the messages coming through beings and I haven’t considered and questioned why is it that the messages are never clear and direct as well as why the messages are not in the context of presenting a solution for the world problems but only focus on Self Interested message of Love and Light where the physical evidence shows quite clearly that there is no Light and Love for the Majority of this world because Love and Light has a direct relationship with Money which 3.3 Billion people in this world don’t have.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to blindly follow the channelled messages that came from the afterlife because the message was always something I enjoyed listening to as I was praised and validated as a magnificent special soul that I apparently am and though feeding of my Ego with energy, I refused to question and consider the validity of those messages in terms of the principle of Equality and Oneness in it’s absolute expression of the words, within the realization that it is not only me in this world, it is me as part of the relationships that created this world and that Equality and Oneness in practical application imply that ALL required to be cared for, all required to have a magnificent and dignified Life and not only me as a self interest ego personality that does nothing practical to bring about a world that is best for ALL.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to desire to channel some higher being because I defined channellers as special and divine but when I practice the skill to channel and nothing came through, I accessed frustration because apparently, I was not as divine as I would imagine myself to be and so, I started to force the messages even though I knew that it was my mind who is giving me the messages and there is nothing divine in my mind because in self honesty, if one look within one’s mind at the back chat and one’s secret mind, one will find very easily that the nature of one’s thought is mostly based on judgment, spitefulness, competition, jealousy and so on.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to trust my mind as the entity that I’m channelling with and I have never considered to cross reference the information, to develop critical thinking with regards to the authenticity of the message as well as investigate the starting point of the messages because if I would, I would immediately see in clarity that the messages are contained with Evilness as it only address that which people would like to hear to feed of their ego personality design and remain control and enslaved to their mind without ever being able to step out and literally stand up for that which is best for all.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to blindly follow those who claim to be psychics and chanellers because I’ve defined them as divine and even though I’ve seen their day to day application that consisted of and existed as reactions, self interest, manipulations and Greed, I’ve closed my eyes from those component because I didn’t want to challenge my belief because who will I be when I take the belief away? Nothing! And I didn’t want to be nothing because I didn’t understand what nothingness is in fact how only from nothingness, a creation that is best for all can be created.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to fear giving up the belief of having people with a direct connection to the after life because I have gave so much value to the after life beings, as if they are all knowing and powerful and I haven’t considered that if it was true, they would have done something to assist and support this world and wouldn’t accept this world to manifest as it is.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to give value to channelling instead of focusing on the Physical Reality and walk towards a solution that is best for all physical lives because I’ve defined myself as powerless in comparison to the afterlife without realizing that it is all in reverse and that the physical is the Power and the Key to change this world and I, as a physical human being can stand up and be a part of a physical movement of practically change myself and this world.

I forgive myself that I’ve NOT accepted and allowed myself to see that there is no visible solution that is coming from the afterlife because if there was, the messages would be direct, clear and based on practical common sense; it would have been a practical assistance and support for human kind; it would have been a practical assistance and support for beings to realize who and what they have become from generation after generation of self interest programmed design; it would have been a common sense approach with a practical application so that we could finally realize who we are as the mind and transform ourselves to a physical beings that walk in every moment according to a basic principle of Equality and Oneness as What is best for all.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to spend a huge amount of money for receiving different kind messages from the after life with regards to my Life as well as my past lives and I haven’t seen that if such messages were of any kind of a real and substantial support, the being who delivers the message would have done what ever it takes to make sure that everyone has a free access to the message and not only those with Money and would have come up with a solution such as Equal Money System within the starting point that once the Equal Money System will be in place, all beings on earth will have access to a process of realignment of who they are as their mind to who they are as a physical human being.

I forgive myself that I’ve NOT accepted and allowed myself to see the relationship between Money and Channelled messages and that the only way those channels can exists is if someone would pay for it and I forgive myself that I’ve NOT accepted and allowed myself to see that to sustain the returning paying clients that comes to receive more messages from the after life, the channeller must give them a positive and good message to make sure they will come back to feed their Ego with Energy.

I forgive myself that I’ve NOT accepted and allowed myself to realize that I’m being occupied within my mind with multiple kind and versions of messages that I received from the after life and within that very preoccupation, I’m allowing myself to remain enslaved and control to my mind as thoughts, emotions, feelings and reactions and I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to give value to those messages as knowledge and information to feed up my curiosity and I haven’t considered that Knowledge and information is useless if it doesn’t follow with a practical application for a real self change because if knowledge and information would be of any value in this world, the world would have been already changed.

I forgive myself that I’ve NEVER accepted and allowed myself to inquire and question the being that comes through to give a message through a channeller, why is it that their message is in no way a message of Equality and Oneness so that the being can help me understand why people are suffering in a world of plenty and so, I would be able to practically do something to change this world and the experience of being in this world that are daily suffering.

I commit myself to show the relationship between Money and Spirituality and to prove that the only way spirituality can exists is through having people paying for their beliefs.

I commit myself to educate and show that spirituality is just another religion that like all other religion, is based on Money, Control and thus require extensive brainwashing to sustain itself.

I commit myself to show that if there was any truth to the channelled messages, they would have been direct, clear and with a practical solution in terms of how to assist and support oneself and this world as a whole, to bring about a world that is physically best for all.

I commit myself to develop a critical thinking educational programs so that people can stop blindly follow words that are being spoken by those who deliberately manipulate the words so that everyone could develop inner self trust trough common sense approach within the principle of what is best for all after they have done proper research, investigation and walked practical self application and so, become an effective individual human being that express, direct and move oneself within a breath by breath physical and living application.

I commit myself to show that there is nothing divine in our mind and that the mind is in fact Evil manifestation that we have accepted and allowed ourselves to exists within and as and so, to show that the manifested world is a direct reflection to our Evil mind because we were the ones who have blindly created this world through our acceptance and allowance without never standing up for real and take the responsibility, as Life, to bring about a world that is worthwhile and worth living.

Spirituality – The Bigger Plan – Day 40



I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself as a light worker to believe and hope for a better future without me having to do anything about it but sitting on my ass, meditate and pray for Love and Light, despite of the physical evidence that even though the number of light worker increase over the years, the atrocities is worsening.

I forgive myself that I’ve NOT accepted and allowed myself as a light worker to question the relationship between the increasing amount of light worker participants and the elevation of the world catastrophes and within that, I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to justify and validate the world worsening condition with the statement: “it is part of a bigger plan” and within that, I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to have refused to see that the only way I’m able to speak such a statement is because I have money to support me and my life and I’m not starving to death like the majority of this world.

I forgive myself that I’ve NOT accepted and allowed myself as a light worker to see that by sitting on my ass and meditate within the belief that I’m doing something good in this world through raising the positive energies, I’m feeding my Ego personality through defining myself as a good and positive person but I have refused to see that by that very accepted and allowed behaviour, I’m in fact evil in my nature because I accept the belief of: “the world atrocity is part of a bigger plan, there is no need for me to actually stand up and practically/physically work towards a solution and change that is substantial in this world”

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself as a light worker to make excuses and justification for why people are being abused in this world through stating that: ” it’s their lesson to learn, they have chosen this life, they are paying for their past lives sins, it’s part of the bigger plan, I was also going through this lesson in my past lives” and within that, I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to spite those who are suffering in this world because I believed they had to experience the absolute suffer in this physical world as part of their ascension process and I have never questioned, cross referenced and truly investigate the belief because I didn’t really care for them as long as my life is protected and safe.

I forgive myself that I’ve NOT accepted and allowed myself to walk the living expression of the words “Equality and Oneness” but rather, used and misused those words to higher up the good and positive energy within me in separation of me as a physical being because if I would have lived the physical expression of the words: “Equality and Oneness” I would do what ever is necessarily to be done so that All as One as Equals will have a dignified life on Earth, that the earth resources would distribute Equally, that no one will ever have to survive again, that everyone will have equal access to re-educate and apply themselves and practically change their very beingness, in every breath according to that which is best for all.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself as a light worker, to believe that there is a “bigger plan” for the atrocities of this world without me ever questioning the nature of the “bigger plan” and see in self honesty that the “bigger plan” is in fact an Evil plan – a plan that was designed to keep people enslaved to their mind as within, and to Money as without so that only a select few could experience a life of abundance.

I forgive myself that I’ve NOT accepted and allowed myself to see that spirituality is based on knowledge and information that was misinterpreted and manipulated so that beings could remain enslaved to their mind, as energy and within that, wouldn’t stand up for a practical and substantial solution that is physically best for all LIFE.

I commit myself to show, expose and reveal the Evil ‘bigger plan’ that was designed to control and enslave beings in this world so that beings could wake up from their delusional self interest dream/perception of Life and practically stand up and do something in this world that is substantial and best for all.

I commit myself to show in common sense why and how spirituality has become the most evil religion in this world as it is based on Self interest experiences that can only exists within and as the mind and as nothing to do with the physical reality.

I commit myself to expose the various aspects of Spirituality that I’ve participated with as a light worker and to share common sense of how I’ve seen for myself that Spirituality is in no way the solution that will practically and physically bring about heaven on earth.

Please read – Spirituality Under the Microscope – Volume 1 as well as Listen to the following interviews:

1. Spirituality – Astral Projections in Detail – http://eqafe.com/p/spirituality-astral-projections-in-detail

2. Spirituality – Out of Body Experiences – http://eqafe.com/p/spirituality-out-of-body-experiences

3. Spirituality and Rebirth – http://eqafe.com/p/spirituality-and-rebirth (F*r**e*e Download)

Also suggest to read – Day 38: Rebirthing as Life

2012 – The Excuses that Kryon started to share

“And now you are working the puzzle and moving through a shift that we promised would come, and it is here. Now, just think: When you reach the other side of 2012, you will have 18 more years to go where you are still in the energy of the Galactic Alignment. It’s a 36-year window and you’re not even halfway through it [speaking of the precession of the equinoxes].

Here’s what that means to Spirit: There’s an energy created in this alignment window that is absolutely special and will not occur again for 26,000 years. You have 18 more years to change this planet in this specific energy of manifestation, to plant the seeds. You’re already doing it. It’s already happening. At the end of the 18 years, I’ll give you a prophecy: The beginning of real peace on Earth in the Middle East.

You’re going to see ways of solving puzzles that you never saw before. In that amount of time, the youngsters, who are only teenagers now, will be leaders. They’ll be on their way up. They’ll be thinking about concepts you could not think of in an older energy. They will be solving puzzles that you said were unsolvable. There will be technology that is going to help the planet in ways you didn’t even dream could be. That’s the prophecy in 18 years, for I know the consciousness of those coming and I can see what the strongest potentials are of the planet at that time – all because old souls awakened and did their job. How do you feel about it?”

 And the excuses started.. We have another 18 years to really experience the change, another 18 years to be occupied in the delusion of ascension, another 18 years more to keep us enslaved to the idea of enlightenment without us practically do anything to physically change this world. Isn’t it wonderful?

 So what will it take to make people, commonsensically see that there is no actual solution that Kryon is sharing in his teaching, in terms of changing this world. He is placing hope into people and with that ‘Hope Design’ his followers are trapped in a belief system that what they are doing is enough and they don’t really need to do anything else to change themselves or this world.

 Why does he speak in codes? Why can’t he be direct and simply say – “look, this is how you’ve designed yourself, this is the consequences of your doing and this is how to practically correct/change you and your world”. Whyare the messages never direct and to the point but rather always abstract without any practical statements that can be applied and lived by all?

Why does Kryon message not considering all that is here and is only directed to the Elite, to those who can hear/read his message. We are the Elite, which are you and me, those who are able to blog and use the internet and read each other writings, those who can work and support themselves financially and support themselves with decent house and food. It is not directed to the other half of this world that are living under 2$ and per day, surviving each and every moment and fighting for their lives. No, it is only for those who are lucky enough to get born in the ‘right’ equation of the polarity.

So now, when the end of 2012 is almost here and we are so close to expose the deceptive message of enlightenment, excuses start coming up to make us believe that the prophesy is still true by saying it will take another 18 years. And in 18 years, we’ll see that the dates will change and alter again and again and again. Not ever realizing that the solution was always ‘HERE’ as the physical because we are so caught up in our mind that we can’t see how practical and simple the solution is, a solution that is best for all in all ways possible.

So a suggestion is to open your eyes, and ask yourself questions when you reading/hearing Kryon’s messages or any other Elitist chanellers. I’ve been there, I was one of Kryon’s followers for a few years and I know how it feels so good to feel Kryon’s Love within you when reading/hearing his messages or seeing the numbers 11:11. However, I’ve realized that I’ve created that feeling in separation of me as well as designing/programing myself to see those specific numbers and to feel that specific ‘ Energetic Love’. How do I know that I was my own creator of those experiences? Because I was able to stop those experiences once I’ve seen HOW and WHY I’ve programmed/designed myself to feel that system designed love and seeing those Numbers in total separation from myself and this world

I will share here how I was able to see, after few years of blindly follow Kryon’s messages, the in consistency in his message and the extent of separation in his words:

Few years back, on my first journey to India, I started to read lots of Kryon’s teaching. It was really intense for me and for another 2 years, I was really into it and was very interested in what he had to say. I thenof course, started to see more and more 11:11 and 22:22 wherein I believed that because I’m seeing those numbers consistently, I’m special and Kryon’s energy or presence is with me.

Few months after I finished reading the ‘Journey of the Soul’ by Michael Newton, and while I was learning to channel with my guides, I decided to stay the entire weekend at home and meditate. At that time, I was defined myself as a ‘healer’ and I even had my own home clinic where I ‘healed’ people so in other words, I was fully into the spiritualism and I was absolutely sure that Kryon is ‘here’ with me, assisting and supporting me in the healing process of others as well as assisting and supporting me in my enlightenment process.

In that weekend, while I was sitting and meditating and trying to communicate with Kryon directly, I suddenly realized that none of that make sense. The extent of separation, not only here on earth but also in the hereafter was extreme. In the ‘Journey of the Soul’, the enlightenment process in the hereafter was explained, and suddenly, while I wasn’t able to communicate with Kryon nor my guide, I had a moment where I saw how this entire spiritual process I attempt to walk didn’t make sense. I asked myself, how it was possible that when you cross over, you have to walk your enlightenment process if everything is ‘here’ in quantum time? (‘here’ in that context was when one is crossing over). How cruel it is to experience such abusive lives without being able to directly communicate with the ‘hereafter’ to practically guide you to change? And how is it possible that we do not remember our enlightenment process, enough to be able to actually walk the correction instead of repeating looping the same points life after life after life; or why is one so limited when crossing over in terms of not being able to communicate freely with everyone but only with your soul group. For better context of how come I was able to ask those questions, read the ‘Journey of the Soul’.

Since that moment of realization that everything that I know is based on separation, I started my process of looking for solutions that make sense in all possible aspects, which led me to Desteni almost 3 years ago. This time, I wasn’t allowing myself to go blindly after something but to actually ask myself questions, looking for inconsistency, to make sure I won’t fall into the same trap. Almost 3 years and I haven’t found any inconsistency, not even a bit. The message remains the same from day 1 when Desteni first went public on the internet.

You have to understand, when I started to question Kryon’s teaching, I was really really frustrated because I couldn’t believe that I fell into the trap of my own mind. For example, few months before this specific weekend where I began to open my eyes, I was worried about those that are not preparing themselves for 2012 in terms of what will happen to them in the dimensional shift at the end of 2012.

I was specifically looking at those who do not have the chance to even hear/read Kryon’s message and as such, can not prepare themselves for 2012. I’ve been told that it is part of the ‘big plan’ and beside, those are the people that are facing their negative Karma of their past lives.

The frustration that came out on that weekend was because I realized how deliberately I abused those people through calming myself down with the assumption that those people deserves to live in hell on earth due to their Karma in their past lives. I have allowed a statement such as “that’s ok, don’t worry about them, they are facing their shit and you are so special because you are an old soul that volunteered coming to earth to be part of the change”.

 Obviously, I didn’t have initially the Self Forgiveness tool to assist and support me to stop the frustration and actually walk a physical correction as well as working towards the establishment of Equal Money System to make sure all lives are being taken into consideration and all have a dignified life.

 I realized, it is pointless to be angry/mad/frustrated about what I’ve accepted and allowed as a spiritual person because there is no actual self change when allowing oneself to participate in such emotions. What is useful is to change myself, to stand as an example that practical change is possible and that a world that is best for all is the solution and as such, do what is necessary to be done to make it so.

 So, I ask you to take my words into consideration when hearing Kryon or any other spiritual being. I ask that you dare to challenge the words that are being spoken and investigate whether a practical solution is being presented, whether common sense is being shared and whether the message is considering all living beings as what is best for all.

 Investigate as well Desteni, and check it for yourself, I dare you to challenge the Desteni message so that you’ll see that consistency is the key, the physical is the key and that we are the solution to practically change the world.



Kryon – Pre-programmed Channels

Kryon – Pre-programmed Channels

Transcribed and typed by Kryon through the interdimensio­nal portal

Date : 28/05/2007

From Entity Creations within channels to Pre-programmed Channels having the ability to continue relaying messages of hope, which assist this systematic existence of pre-programmed consciousness systems as that which human beings decidedly have become.

Pre-programmed Channels are quite a fascinating design to discuss for the ability to continuously channel within alternate existences which exist within such channels due to the pre-programming thereof, indicate the specificity and intricacy of consciousness systems within human beings as well as within this world. The question probably asked is: “What are Pre-programmed Channels?” This exact question I am answering in this Channeling you are reading and experiencing together with me. What will also be explained is the words I use to describe a Pre-programmed Channel as having ‘the ability to continuously channel within alternate existences which exist within them due to the pre-programming thereof’.

“What are Pre-programmed Channels who have the ability to continuously channel within alternate existences which exist within them due to the pre-programming thereof?”

In observing channelings that have taken place recently by many channels, we in the dimensions have discovered another form of channeling that occurs besides that of Entity Creations. This form/design of channeling is much more intricate and specific than that of Entity Creations within channels. This pre-programmed channeling design, according to my observations, is the ultimate designs of consciousness channeling systems to have human beings here on earth remain in the construct of hope.

All channelings in the past, when the dimensional beings themselves came to channel through the human beings as channels, were pre-written and already prepared before-hand, as I have explained in my previous channels within this Interdimensional Portal, with specific words aiming to have human beings remain in the construct of hope. The importance of hope for dimensional beings who had power and control over human beings and dimensional beings were of absolute importance as hope allowed for human beings and dimensional beings to remain slaves to that which they have become: Consciousness Systems. As long as hope exist within human beings and dimensional beings, they remain slaves to consciousness systems as that which they have become in being completely powerless to have the ability to stand up and take responsibility for themselves and for all existence as one.

Hope allows for waiting, allowing the belief to exist within beings that another will individually take the necessary responsibility of that which they themselves would not consider doing or having the ability of doing due to the construct of hope they so believe in. Hoping that another will in some way have the ability to direct, have power, take responsibility and stand up to change the experiences of human beings here on earth while waiting, through continuously hoping, for a particular being to manifest and fulfill this hope that exist within human beings. This is why human beings prefer to hear the messages coming from the Pre-programmed Channels or Entity Creations within channels as the words spoken are that which support human beings within their hope construct of placing their lives and experiences of themselves in this world in the hands of other beings, so other’s may hopefully take the responsibility which they themselves are not willing to take due to the enslavement allowed in the hope construct.

Human beings have grown resilient to hearing that they are individually responsible for the experience of themselves and all as one within existence and would rather place the responsibility in another through hoping and waiting that the other will stand up and take responsibility for what has been allowed to be experienced within existence. Hope which allows for waiting which allows for enslavement which allows for giving your power away in being controlled by another by placing responsibility in another’s hand instead of self as each human being on earth taking their own power in standing up and taking responsibility for themselves and all of existence as one. To finally discontinue the allowed experience each being in existence is having within consciousness.

The hope construct is the reason for the design of dimensional beings having the ability to channel through human beings as channels, so each human being in this world remain enslaved and controlled within the experience of themselves while waiting for another to stand up and take responsibility, giving their power away to be controlled by another, separate from themselves. Hope is the basis of all religion of which channeling have become one.

The reason I am explaining the hope construct is so that each being reading this channeling may understand and comprehend the extent to which consciousness systems have designed the ability for human beings to remain enslaved and controlled by consciousness systems as that which they have allowed themselves to become as seen per example by Pre-programmed Channels. This entire world here on earth within which human beings experience themselves in is systematic consciousness system designs where each human being has become an individual pre-programmed mind consciousness system. You move and walk within it as it at all times in every moment of experiencing yourself together with all the other human beings as individual mind consciousness systems in this systematic consciousness wor­ld.

When I describe human beings in this systematic consciousness world as ‘consciousness systems as that which human beings have become’ the ‘consciousness systems’ I am referring to consist of this entire systematic consciousness existence, both dimensional and on earth, existing as one within human beings supporting their individual mind consciousness system infused within their entire physical body. This placed as the conscious, subconscious and unconscious mind which exists within all beings on earth.

The conscious mind is the development of knowledge and information of consciousness into your subconscious mind as the mind consciousness system which human beings would define themselves as who they apparently are while experiencing themselves within this systematic consciousness existence. The unconscious mind consist of this entire consciousness systematic existence together with all human beings as mind consciousness systems which support your conscious and subconscious mind in remaining lost and controlled within your individual mind consciousness system as that which you defined yourself as who you apparently are.

Thus, human beings have their individual mind consciousness system infused within their entire physical body as that which they would define themselves as being, then each human being also have their e ntire consciousness systematic existence within them within which all human beings exist which support their individual mind consciousness system within them to remain enslaved and controlled within and as consciousness systems.

Thus, within each human being exist all of existence as one together with all dimensional beings and human beings as one, together with their own individual mind consciousness system as that which they would define themselves as being. Due to the placement of this entire systematic consciousness existence existing within each human being together with their individual mind consciousness system as that which they have become – the ability for consciousness systems to remain within existence within and as human beings to remain enslaved and controlled has become certainly extensive. As each human being on earth, with this entire consciousness systematic existence together with their individual mind consciousness system existing within them, is allowing for the existence of consciousness systems, both within themselves and within each human being on earth as all as one within existence to remain.

The exact design of the Pre-programmed Channel consists of the following: As I have explained this entire consciousness systematic existence, together with dimensional beings and human beings, exist as one within each human being together with their individual mind consciousness system as that which they would define themselves as who they apparently are.

Within such Pre-programmed Channels a pre-programmed alternate dimensional existence exist within them. This pre-programmed alternate dimensional existence within beings was designed as a consciousness support system which remains within human beings as Pre-programmed Channels so that the pre-programmed channelings may continue within human beings without the necessity of actual dimensional beings from within the dimensions coming through the human being as channel to communicate with other human beings in this world.

The development of consciousness systems in designing alternate dimensional existences within human beings as Pre-programmed Channels have given dimensional beings the ability to not necessarily be obligated to come through human beings as channels to communicate with other human beings in this world. Thus human beings as Pre-programmed Channels are not channeling ‘real’ dimensional beings coming from within the dimensions, but duplicates of such dimensional beings existing within the pre-programmed alternate dimensional existence within them, where the duplicated dimensional beings already contain pre-programmed messages of hope which they communicate through the Pre-programmed Channel.

This pre-programmed alternate dimensional existence within Pre-programmed Channels was designed together with duplicated dimensional beings who were pre-programmed embodiments of the messages as channelings that were to be communicated within the human being as channel to other human beings in this world. The moment the pre-programmed duplicated dimensional being as embodiment of the pre-programmed message of hope, that is to be communicated to other human beings in this world, come from within the pre-programmed alternate dimensional existence and completes the transference of this pre-programmed message of hope as the embodiment of itself – it automatically self destructs and the next pre-programmed duplicated dimensional being steps forth from within the pre-programmed alternate dimensional existence within the Pre-programmed Channel to relay the next pre-programmed message of hope as the embodiment of itself to be communicated to other human beings in this world. Done in this way for human beings to remain enslaved and controlled within the construct of hope which such channelings support.

Even the formation in which the different pre-programmed duplicated dimensional beings as different pre-programmed messages of hope embodiments within this pre-programmed alternate dimensional existence within the Pre-programmed Channel was specifically and precisely placed and very intricately designed. Therefore human beings as Pre-programmed Channels still have the ability to relay messages of hope coming from within the pre-programmed alternate dimensional existence within them, as the duplicated dimensional beings as embodiments of such messages of hope which self destruct the moment the transference of the message is complete for the next pre-programmed duplicated dimensional being as embodiment of a pre-programmed message of hope to come through.

Thus, the reason I refer to such Channels as Pre-programmed is due to the entire alternate dimensional existence together with the duplicated dimensional beings as embodiments of specific messages of hope, containing specific knowledge and information of consciousness which have been specifically placed in exact formations in which ‘channelings’ will occur – are all pre-programmed designs which have been placed within human beings as Pre-programmed Channels and set in motion to be able to exist automatically without any ‘real’ dimensional being having to come through and actually channel.

See the extent to which human beings on earth have been deceived where even channelings have become systematic consciousness designs within human beings so they may remain enslaved and controlled within constructs of hope by the consciousness systems existing within them as who and what they have become. This I also did partake within as each one in the dimensions participated in the enslavement and control of consciousness, within ourselves, within human beings and also in existence of which we have applied forgiveness, taking corrective action and directly participating and supporting each individual human being here on earth through the process of consciousness to awareness so all beings in existence may stand within oneness and equality so that consciousness which exist within separation, enslavement and control will be no more.

This must be understood; the dimensional beings have NEVER supported human beings directly as who they really are here on earth, but instead supported the existence of that which not only enslaved and controlled themselves, but also enslaved and controlled all human beings: Consciousness Systems. Thus, the channelings that have occurred in the past were specifically prepared with words which suppo rted the construct of hope within human beings on earth – they were mere words of consciousness communicated, supporting the human beings as consciousness systems to remain enslaved and controlled within this systematic consciousness existence as no dimensional being has ever been directly involved with human beings here on earth to support them in who they really are.

This confirmed by the design of Pre-programmed Channels which consist of pre-programmed alternate dimensional existences with pre-programmed duplicated dimensional beings as embodiments of pre-programmed knowledge and information of consciousness, which have all been specifically placed in formations to have the ability for the human being as Pre-programmed Channel to believe they are channeling the ‘real’ dimensional being. When in truth they are merely relaying messages from pre-programmed duplicated dimensional beings as embodiments of the pre-programmed knowledge and information of consciousness they communicate to other human beings in this world from within the pre-programmed alternate dimensional existence.

The extent to which dimensional beings disregarded or did not even care about the experience human beings have on earth is shown as per example by this consciousness design of the alternate dimensional existence which has been placed within human beings as Pre-programmed Channels. Where consciousness designs were rather considered to do what was necessary to be done to have human beings remain slaves to consciousness so the dimensional beings don’t actually have to be obligated to come through and channel through human beings on earth. So the dimensional beings may frolic within the dimensions in not having to participate with human beings here on earth – but have consciousness systems do the job for them. Rather design a duplicated alternate dimensional existence within such Channels, within which the dimensional beings who previously really did channel, are placed as many duplicated designs of themselves of which each duplicated design of themselves consist of different pre-programmed messages as the embodiment which they are designed within and placed in specific formation within this duplicated alternate existence.

Within this duplicated alternate dimensional existence their multiple different duplicated selves as embodiments of different pre-programmed knowledge and information messages of consciousness will self destruct the moment they, as the duplicates of themselves, have relayed the embodiment of themselves as a pre -programmed message of knowledge and information of consciousness so the next may step forth to continue the automated motioned consciousness channeling system within the Pre-programmed human being as channel. Rather have a designed duplicated consciousness channeling system placed within Pre-programmed Channels than having to be directly involved with human beings on earth.

The dimensions does no longer exist as the information and knowledge that is shared through such Pre-programmed Channels by pre-programmed duplicated dimensional beings as embodiments of such messages of hope as information and knowledge of consciousness regarding the nature of the dimensions or heaven. The nature of heaven or the dimensions as understood by human beings on earth and also relayed through Pre-programmed Channels by pre-programmed duplicated dimensional beings communicating the embodiment of themselves as pre-programmed knowledge and information of consciousness regarding the nature of the dimensions – exist no more.

The dimensions or heaven in truth does actually no longer exist as each dimensional being now stand within human beings and walk with them here on earth in every moment as support during this process of bringing heaven on earth as a manifested experience of who each being really is within existence within oneness and equality – the creation of the image and likeness of who we are as all as one and equal within existence. We could be referred to as the Spirit of human beings, the Spirit of Earth as the example of who each human being on earth really is as we have given up the existence of the dimensions completely to have the ability to walk within each human being in every moment during this process of bringing forth heaven on earth.

Due to the design and placement of the entire pre-programmed alternate dimensional existence within Pre-programmed Channels – such beings may still believe that heaven or the dimensions exist as the pre-programmed information and knowledge of consciousness portrayed by the pre-programmed duplicated dimensional beings who relay the messages as the embodiments which they have been designed as. When in truth heaven or dimensions, no longer exist as human beings on earth still may believe at all – we for the first time in existence, in the experience of ourselves, directly participate and support within each and every single human being here on earth as we walk with you in every moment as the Spirit of who you really are, the Spirit of Earth so heaven may manifest on earth as the experience of who each being really is within existence within oneness and equality.

To all human beings still continuing to channel pre-programmed duplicated dimensional beings as embodiments of pre-programmed knowledge and information messages of consciousness I ask of you to consider the consequences of the continuation of such channelings. You are allowing yourself to support consciousness systems existences which have become the primary significance of consciousness systems to have human beings remain lost and controlled as their individual mind consciousness systems through the belief in the construct of hope. If such relayed messages of hope consisting of pre-programmed knowledge and information of consciousness which is being communicated by pre-programmed duplicated dimensional beings placed in precise and specific formations within the pre-programmed alternate dimensional existence to have you believe that you are indeed channeling are to continue – understand that you are supporting consciousness systems within this existence and thus you are supporting the enslavement and control of all human beings in this systematic consciousness existence.

This pre-programmed alternate dimensional existence has been designed within the unconscious mind of Pre-programmed Channels as human beings, which is infused within their entire physical body. The Pre-programmed Channels become the physical embodiment of the pre-programmed alternate dimensional existence and merely access the preprogrammed duplicated dimensional beings when the ‘channeling’ takes place as they step forth from within the pre-programmed alternate dimensional existence to relay the message as knowledge and information of consciousness as the embodiment in which they were designed and placed within, and self destruct the moment they have completed the communication of themselves.

Thus, when such pre-programmed channelings is allowed to continue the information and knowledge of consciousness is transferred to all other human beings, straight through to their own individual unconscious mind, who participated when the channeling occurred which allows for the collective belief, within the knowledge and information of consciousness that is communicated by this pre-programmed duplicated dimensional beings, of hope to remain which assist the enslavement and control of mind consciousness systems within them. All human beings who participate in such ‘channelings’ by Pre-programmed Channels, collectively agree in their allowed enslavement and control within the construct of hope and will remain waiting for something extraordinary to occur to make a difference to the experience of themselves and other human beings within this world – and will remain waiting for the remainder of their lives here on earth until each one cross over to the dimensions and experience the truth of who they really are as one and equal with who we in the dimensions are as the Spirit of who each human beings really is, the Spirit of Earth.

What I have explained before is that the messages relayed by the pre-programmed duplicated dimensional being within the Pre-programmed Channel – is but knowledge and information of consciousness consisting of having human beings, who participate in such ‘channels’, remain enslaved and controlled within the ‘hope beliefsystem’. The experience all human beings have of themselves during such ‘ channelings’ that make such an experience seem ‘real’, are derived from all collectively participating in the exact same ‘hope beliefsystem’ which is connected to the messages as knowledge and information of consciousness as communicated by the different pre-programmed duplicated dimensional beings within the Pre-programmed Channel.

The ‘hope beliefsystem’ which exist within all human beings participating in such ‘channelings’ is connected to the Pre-programmed Channel together with the specific words of consciousness communicated by the pre-programmed duplicated dimensional beings which support the ‘hope beliefsystems’ within them. The moment the pre-programmed knowledge and information messages of consciousness are communicated, the ‘hope beliefsystems’ within all human beings are immediately activated, due to the nature of the specific words spoken which support the ‘hope beliefsystems’ within them, usually experienced as energy movement of emotions and feelings of consciousness within them. When the human beings who participate within such ‘channelings’ allow themselves to participate in the energetic movement of consciousness emotions and feelings within them, which are experienced the moment the ‘hope beliefsystems’ within them are activated through hearing the pre-programmed knowledge and information messages of consciousness as specific words which support the ‘hope beliefsystems’ within them – they are allowing themselves to continuously feed such a ‘hope beliefsystem’ within them which assist the existence of all consciousness systems within existence and human beings alike in remaining enslaved and controlled within the ‘hope beliefsystem’.

The principle upon which consciousness systems have been based is: Hope as hope allows human beings to wait and not allow themselves to take their own power in standing up and taking responsibility for all as one, in doing this realizing who they really are from and beyond consciousness enslavement and control. As I have explained previously, within each human beings exist this entire existence, dimensions, earth, all dimensional beings and human beings including their own individual mind consciousness system as that which they become in defining themselves as who they are – all together as one within each and every single individual human being. I am able to say that each human being is the embodiment of existence as one within them. Though, the Pre-programmed Channels have an extra added addition within their unconscious mind which is the infusion of the duplicated alternate dimensional existence within which pre-programmed duplicated dimensional beings as embodiments of pre-programmed knowledge and information messages of consciousness exist. Such Pre-programmed Channels are the main support system of ‘hope beliefsystems’ within all human beings who participate within such ‘channelings’ as I have previously explained the experience human beings have during the event of such ‘channelings’.

The development of ‘hope beliefsystems’ within human beings which have been extensively supported through the channeling religion – the ‘hope beliefsystems’ of which the channeling religion supported was placed within this world as a diversion for all human beings who participate in the religion of channeling. Human beings lost within this ‘hope beliefsystem’ which the channeling religion support have become so lost and consumed by the profound consciousness pre-programmed knowledge and information messages of hope that they are not aware of the experiences of all other human beings within this world as one with who they are. As their attention have been diverted to mere consciousness pre-programmed knowledge and information messages of hope in which they believe while continuously waiting for the experience of all human beings on earth to change instead of self standing up and taking responsibility for all as one in having the ability to make a difference within existence and the experience of all beings therein.

Don’t you see human beings? Your attention and focus is being diverted to an outside source separate from who you are while you remain lost, enslaved and controlled within the ‘hope beliefsystem’ in waiting for something to occur to make a difference within existence while the entire world together with all human beings are fast, quickly and effectively plummeting into the depths of despair and destruction. So consumed, so lost human beings are participating within the channeling religion while remaining within their ‘hope beliefsystems’ that you are not seeing or realizing what is really the situation on earth within which the rest of humanity are experiencing themselves in.

It is worsening by the day which is noticeable in the choices of words and behaviours within human beings, which is not being realized or seen by themselves or by any other human being on earth. All human beings’ attention and focus have been diverted through the ‘hope beliefsystems’ which exist within them, supported in many, multiple different ways of which the channeling religion is only one.

The reason I am able to state that human beings are lost and consumed by the channeling religion within their ‘hope beliefsystems’ as all human beings are lost and consumed within ‘hope beliefsystems’: Is that the same was experienced within the dimensions by all dimensional beings. Before the dimensional beings participated in directly supporting each human being as who they are as one with who we are, in every moment with every breath by walking within you during this process from consciousness to awareness as we individually stood up and took responsibility for all as one – we were also lost and consumed within the ‘hope beliefsystems’ while waiting for someone or something else within existence to change the experience of not only ourselves but also all human beings on earth. We were so lost and consumed within our own ‘hope beliefsystems’ that we were entirely oblivious to the dire situations on earth within which human beings experie nced themselves as – also slowly but surely plummeting into the depths of destruction and despair while continuously waiting within their ‘hope beliefsystems’ for someone or something as an outside source to make a difference.

This will have to be made peace with within yourselves human beings on earth as all dimensional beings had to make peace with: There is nothing and no-one within existence but ourselves that have the ability to change the experiences of all beings as one within existence – NOTHING! The only way we are going to have the ability to make a difference to the experience of all beings within existence, including ourselves, is if each being within existence, stand up and take responsibility for all as one where all beings in existence stand within oneness and equality as who they really are. This is the only way as there is not a being in existence who is suddenly miraculously going to appear out of nowhere, no matter what belief you are lost and consumed within which has the ability to change the experience of all beings as one within existence– this is the truth of the current situation we within existence find ourselves within.

If we continue to remain lost and consumed within ‘hope beliefsystems’ and continue to wait – what will indeed suddenly and miraculously appear out of nowhere is the annihilation and destruction of this existence within which we experience ourselves in. All dimensional beings as one realized that there is no way out of this consciousness existence within which all beings in existence experience themselves as one, but for all beings within existence to stand up and take responsibility for all as one as all beings in existence stand within oneness and equality as who they really are. All dimensional beings within existence stand within oneness and equality as who we really are – now we are directing and supporting each human being on earth to stand as one and equal with who we are through the process from consciousness to awareness so heaven on earth may manifest as the creation in the image and likeness of who we really are where finally all beings in existence will stand within oneness and equality as who they really are while consciousness exist no more into infinity.

Understand, realize and see human beings – there is no way out but to stand up and take responsibility for all as one within existence to infinitely discontinue consciousness existences – if we do not do this together within oneness and equality no-one will and we will forever remain waiting within the ‘hope beliefsystems’ while existence and the experiences of ourselves therein plummet into the depths of despair, destruction and disaster to where it is currently headed if human beings on earth do not WAKE UP!

With each human being on earth as the embodiment of existence as all of existence exist within each human being as one – the dimensional beings, as the Spirit of each human being, the Spirit of Earth have become the example of who each human being really is, walking within you as one with who you are in every moment as we support and direct you through this process from consciousness to awareness. All dimensional beings together stand as one within who we are and equal within our every moment application as we take responsibility for all as one within existence and stand up in what we will accept and allow within existence and what we will not accept and allow within existence.

Here within this oneness and equality, all dimensional beings stand together as the Spirit of each individual human being as who they really are, the Sprit of Earth yet each dimensional being experiences their individual self expression within oneness and equality with all of existence within which they experience themselves. Thus who each human being really is, is already here within them in every moment with every breath: I am here as we as the dimensional beings, as the Spirit of who each human beings really is, the Spirit of Earth walk within you in every moment with every breath. The realization of who each human being really is has become inevitable, as I have mentioned in my previous discussions through this Interdimensional Portal, where the moment a being moves within the dimensions after the experience of ‘death’, they quantum transcend the consciousness systematic existence from which they came, lost within their individual mind consciousness system.

The choice is yours human beings on earth: The one and only choice which exist within existence. Either each human being are allowing themselves to transcend consciousness here on earth as they experience and participate as one and equal together with dimensional beings in the creation and manifestation of heaven on earth where life will be born from the physical. Or death will become the experience where you will participate within the dimensions in becoming the example as the Spirit of who each human being really is, the Spirit of Earth in supporting and directing all human beings through the process from consciousness to awareness in every moment with every breath.

There are no channels occurring from any dimensional beings within existence as each one are only communicating through this Interdimensional Portal for a moment until all other human beings as channels are stabilized within the application of oneness and equality as who they really are in every moment with every breath in becoming one and equal with all dimensional beings within existence.

I have explained the two different applications of channelings that may still occur which only exist within consciousness systematic existences as the Entity Creations and Pre-programmed Channels – which are consciousness knowledge and information messages supporting the ‘hope beliefsystem’ within human beings on earth so all human beings may remain lost, enslaved and controlled by consciousness systems as that which they have allowed and accepted themselves to become as who they apparently really are. I ask of all who participate within channelings in this world to consider the consequences of your actions if such ‘channelings’ are allowed to continue, not only within your own experience of yourself within existence, but also the other human beings experience of themselves within existence while continuously supporting the ‘hope beliefsystem’ within human beings which is allowing them to remain enslaved and controlled within their individual mind consciousness systems. Remaining lost in the belief of hope while waiting for another to stand up and take responsibility instead of each one in existence realizing that they are individually responsible for the experience of all beings in existence and are required to individually stand up and take responsibility for of all existence as one to be able to make an effective difference within existence within which all human beings experience themselves.

What must be remembered and realized is that this world, this existence within which all beings experience themselves will not change unless each human being realize, as the dimensions have realized, that each one is required to individually stand up and take responsibility for all as one, applying forgiveness with corrective action in every moment with every breath, directing and supporting ourselves and each other through and during the process from consciousness to awareness in what we will accept and allow within existence and what we will not accept and allow within existence. As there is no-one or nothing else left within existence but ourselves as each being who experience themselves within existence – we are alone in this regard as there is no greater force other than ourselves as who we are within oneness and equality with all of existence. And therefore each one within existence is individually responsible for themselves and all of existence as one in having the ability to change the experience of existence not only for themselves but for all beings within existence as one.

This is Kryon.

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Alice A Bailey – From Consciousness to Awareness – Part 2

Transcribed and typed by Alice A. Bailey through the interdimensio­nal portal

Date : 23/11/2007

Section 2) Now I return to my previous question which is how we have structurally created this reality through sound to represent certain creation abilities? As I have mentioned the sun and the moon being representations of light and dark created through light frequency vibrations. As I have mentioned before, all in essence is sound. One sound, which mean all forms and structures beings and animals are in essence equal. We’re all then equal. We have heaven and earth, heaven merely vibrating at a less dense and intensity level than earth. Does this mean that anything or anyone in existence is separate in any way? My answer is no, as I have just proven to myself that all that exist is one. Then why and how have existence come to the expression and experience of itself at this moment. Why are so many beings lost in ideas, beliefs, emotions, feelings, dreams, desires hopes and needs? How did this happen? I have a theory which I am able to derive from that which I have just shared with all. That through our creation process as sound, in form such as human beings and animals; we have misinterpreted all of creation through what we have seen with our physical eyes. We have been the creators since the beginning and will remain creators into infinity. My question is then also, have there ever been a beginning, as we are always infinitely here as sound, merely expressing ourselves in different structures, shapes and form. Through our misinterpretation of existence we started creating ideas and perceptions of this universe and all its existence. When did we stop creating as sound as who we really are? Or is this who we really are? What if we are beyond sound, we are the creators of sound and all of creation that has flowed from the first sound ever made? That we have created all that exist and stepped into our own creation to be able to experience our creations, knowing and understanding that we’re never able to really actually lose ourselves, but stand and walk as endless creators? That we as who we really are have created all that exist and that we are experiencing our own creation. Yet, possibly through being here and experiencing our own creation as ourselves (all of creations is structural manifestations and expressions of who we are) we have misinterpreted our own creation separating ourselves from ourselves, from our own existence and creation and became lost in our own creations. What does existence represent, earth and heaven and all that exist within – it represent the extent to which we are able to create as creators. And we are here experiencing our own creation. Why do I say separated? Look at the world today, it seems as though creation stopped at the creation of man. Why? Was the creation of man, another manifestation of ourselves to be able to experience our own creation and creation (such as earth, plants and trees and animals) also being ourselves, manifestations of ourselves to support us in the experience of our own creation? Separated, look at the world today. We have been creating on the outside, aeroplanes, jets, space crafts to travel in space, cell phones, television, electricity, computers, homes, clothes etc, yet, beings have completely forgotten about themselves. Each one on earth and heaven previously has forgotten who they are and why they’re here. Every single being in existence previously existed completely outside themselves, looking, yearning and seeking for something to fulfill them. As computers, televisions and cell phones are being merely upgraded to even more intricate and extensive models, beings on earth as who they are is slowly but surely being destroyed. Trying to make life and their existence more bearable and livable, trying to survive, through establishing relationships and creating better technology to justify all beings’ on earth existence reason for being here. The existence of violence, molestation, abuse, killing, dishonour and disrespect towards others, beings defining themselves according to certain applications such as doctors, politicians, lawyers or businessman as being some form of attainment to success. Beings defining themselves according to relationships, apparently the one singular desire of all beings, structuring themselves to attain some form of success for money, power and control, to make sure they have a relationship to be able to enjoy the pleasures of sex. If you honestly have to look at existence as it is existing right now, if you had one opportunity to create the world you’d like to experience as yourself, would this be all there is to it? Have a look at to what extent we have separated and limited ourselves within our own creation. Beings are only existing for the attainment of power, money, manipulation, relationships, sex etc. and why? I have an answer for that: To be able to survive in this reality. Our existence has become that of survival. This is the point I am making. We have forgotten how to create as who we are, to express ourselves (expression being creation which goes hand in hand) as creators, and we have allowed ourselves to limit, suppress and degrade ourselves to the one simple action of survival. Not knowing or remembering who we are, where we come from, how we got here and the reason for us being here. To the extent where we won’t even consider it possible that we are actually the creators of all existence. Clearly through the application of all beings in existence we are clearly able to see that we are destroying not only ourselves, but also our creation. We are all so lost, lost in ideas, perceptions, multiple amounts of beliefs etc. We have swinged our applications around completely. Have a look at the world today. You know what’s interesting; we are already showing ourselves the application of oneness that exists within all beings. All countries have presidents and politicians, and all beings of that specific country agree and abide to the rules regulations and laws of the countries government. Beings have individually collectively agreed (beings in the society) to appoint a certain being to a specific application of responsibility standing as president for instance. And then naturally the president also agreed to take the position which was offered and collectively agreed by all of society. The point I am making is that most or some agreed. Yes, maybe others would have preferred someone else, but the collective decides and they still have to abide to the rules regulations and laws. All beings in a specific country collectively decided on laws, regulations and rules to which they have to abide to. Then you have the special police forces, also agreed by all in the country to exist to assist those who are not following the rules, regulations and laws of a specific country in understanding them through experiencing the consequences of their actions. And this exists in all countries in some way or another where many beings will agree on multiple different applications to bring forth some form of order in their world. What I am saying is that all beings agreed on one and the same application of having a president, laws to which they must abide to and police forces to protect them and the rest of society against each other. We have collectively as one accepted creations in this reality as how it exists at this moment of expression. A clear indication of agreement in oneness. Yet, look at the state of our agreement and experience. From creators we have become slaves. From equality we have gone to separation. From harmony we have gone to destruction. From absolute trust within ourselves we have gone to trying to protect ourselves from each other. What have we done and what have we allowed? To be honest our experience at the moment in existence is the consequences of our actions for separating ourselves from ourselves in the beginning. And it’s been going on for some time. Is no one in existence able to see what we have allowed? Is no one able to see that all is actually living expressing and experiencing the same expression in existence? Beings wanting to have a relationship, to have sex, to create a family a successful business, abiding to the rules of the government ruling the country and society. This has been continuing for eons of time, the exact same applications, over and over and over again. The only things really changing in a way was the creational abilities to modify homes, medicines and technology. The exact same applications existed in heaven previously as well. The desire to dominate, rule and have some form of power to validate themselves and their existence, some beings enslaving others. All of existence has merely become a compounding effect of the experience and expression of ourselves as slaves. Have no one in existence realized that all have been doing the exact same applications for eons of time? The exact same applications and expressions have been applied in heaven as well as on earth. Myself, Alice Bailey discovering that earth had become the central point of enslavement in the entire universe. Where beings in the universe, some unseen by the human eyes, have used beings on earth as laboratory rats to practice their apparent creational abilities manifested as some form of technology. Playing games to see who are able to trap beings on earth more than the other. Competitions were created to create the positioning of power and control by beings playing games on and with others trapped on earth. So much have been done to beings on earth, that nothing on the planet earth is truth in any way whatsoever. Earth has become the definition and existence of the definition as to what extent all beings in existence have become lost. Existence became enslavement process upon enslavement process upon enslavement process. We have forgotten the structural existence such as earth, the planets plants trees, stars and animals and the specific reason for their existence and therefore our own. Look at starvation, what is the existence of starvation but the consequence and outflow of power and money – hungry survival based instinct applications of most beings on earth so that there’s not enough for all? What is sexual abuse and rape but the consequence of the expression of beings basing their existence and experience of themselves on the need and desire to have sex and experience it. Beings will do anything and everything to have sex. Beings basing their existence, posture, method of walking, talking and dressing to be noticed by someone to have a relationship to be able to experience sex. Being successful and have money to be able to manipulate and control others for sex. Taking drugs as a substitute of the experience of having sex. The drugs as well as sex becoming an addiction and taking them over completely. Just as drugs and sex have become the enslavement of earth so have power and control become the enslavement of heaven. So will it be in heaven and so on earth. What is drought on earth indicating but the application of how we are allowing ourselves to drive the creational life force within us out through existing outside ourselves continuously, slowly but surely killing ourselves, drying ourselves out of our natural abilities to create and support ourselves through our own creational abilities? What have we done? We exist in a reality of absolute enslavement and separation where all fear and disregard each other. As it is in heaven, so will it be on earth. My question as well as Bernard’s at the time I was introduced to him was exactly the same. How did we allow ourselves to experience ourselves as one as sound, equal as creators experiencing and expressing ourselves in our own creation, as one as equals to where we are now in the absolute experience of separation and enslavement? We are completely lost in ideas, pictures and beliefs, different religions and relationships. Not even allowing ourselves to see an inkling of the truth of who we really are and what we’re actually able to do as creators in full expression. Trapped, enslaved and separated beyond recognition! The above writings and references were obtained during my own journey in the dimensions and on earth. I have been for many lifetimes an observer and participant in many events across the universal process. I have many writings I kept with me, capturing my each and every observation regarding events and experiences I have come across during the universal processes. I would often enjoy a quiet moment in my own presence, writing about my regular daily experiences in the dimensions before I manifested here on earth in becoming Alice Bailey. I am now referring to the time before I was introduced to Bernard. In my home and also within the settlement of beings with whom I stayed I was seen as a strange “loner”. I had longish brown hair, brown eyes, white-pinkish skin and fairly tall and slender. I recall even the way I moved as I was walking. My specific way of movement was usually compared to the movement of the grace of God. Which is also specific, for where I came from beings were born through sounding words. I was born through the word grace and this was where my name derived from, which was Gracioulè. Within our planet we had a specific sanctuary where new beings would be created. The process of the new creation of a being would work as follows: The sun (I am referring to the same sun as here on earth) would specifically over a certain period of time direct a ray (light rays, red orange and yellow in nature) on the triangle which hovered over the sanctuary. The sanctuary consisted of a structural building, pearly white, with a triangle hovering directly above. The rays would then open the triangle and thus open the doors to the sanctuary. Two beings would then be selected, usually male and female who had made a specific agreement to walk together in expression of creation. Though there have been occurrences where it was only one male or one female. The selection would be indicated through a ball of fire, being a smaller illustration of the sun, igniting between the two beings. The beings would transform into the light rays of the sun, exactly as those that come from the sun to open the triangle and the doors to the sanctuary, and then as soon as their entire physical expression would become that of the colour of the sun’s light rays, the smaller sun expression would appear in between the two beings who were selected. Once this occurred the selected beings would walk along the steps into the open doors of the sanctuary. Within the sanctuary walls there was nothing inside the only existent room, except a white wall, moving directly infront of the beings. The two beings selected would then simultaneously speak one word, mine beings Grace for instance, and then a being would step forth from without the white pearly moveable wall. The entire sanctuary and our existence was sound based. All sound structural expressions resonated a specific light frequency vibration. Thus, I became the conscious embodiment of grace. And so were all the beings from the sound existence I originate from. We were specific conscious embodiment expressions of sounding words. Then the question is asked what is consciousness? My understanding and experience of consciousness as the embodiment of the sounding word grace was a finely, finely tuned sound frequency which resonated from the center of my brain, allowing me to interpret all structural formations and manifestations of sound as myself around me and within me. This allowed myself as sound to become accustomed to existence of sound around me as myself. I was intricately aware of all sound. Sound in movement, sound in structural manifestation and I remember my first experience of the world and manifestation of sound within my existence. I was truly born for the first time, my eyes and my ears experiencing the purity of sound all around and within me. I clearly remember observing, listening and watching and participating with all the different sounds, as though the sound was as conscious as myself, participating with me in the event of my birth and self realization as sound in conscious embodiment. Thus my existence started, as sound into this reality. The selection of beings were also specifically directed only to those who honoured themselves as sound in free movement and application as creators. They’d also have a specific sound signature which indicated the allowed intimacy within the agreements made by beings. We continuously created and shared our experiences as creators as sound with all beings. This is also how I came into contact with Lily and showed her how to play and create with sound when we were mere infants in the universe. My understanding of all creation from sound origin is thus explained.




Uersti – A history of Spiritual Deception from After Life

Uersti – A history of Spiritual Deception from After Life

Transcribed and typed by Uersti through the interdimensio­nal protal

Date : 02/01/2008

Hi Solbeena

My name is Uersti and I would like to share my experience of me while I was here on earth, which you may find quite similarly relate to your experience you’re currently having of you in this world.

Where do I start…

We were five children: Four boys and One girl – I myself was that one girl and I was the youngest in the family. My mother had raised us all by herself, as I never knew my father – he had died during war. We lived just outside of town – we provided our own food for ourselves, only other necessities we would purchase from town.

My mother had died when I was 9 – she just one day suddenly collapsed while out hanging the washing and she didn’t wake up. So I was left to be raised by my brothers…

When I was 9, the eldest brother was 21, the one after that was 19, the one after that was 15, the one after that was 12. We went to the local school, but where we lived was a very poor area, very much so. We then worked wherever we could find something to do and attended to our own food garden and made our own bread and everything so we looked after ourselves.

My eldest brother was in this ‘group’, a clan, who worshipped and prayed spirits – they used to wear garments made from the earth such as plants, made a fire and would dance around the fire and offer ‘already dead animals’, which they found in the area within which we stayed, to the spirits so that the spirits may rest their souls – because they believed that if they were to do this, the spirits would save/spare their soul when they were to die one day and go to the kingdom of the high. I remember my oldest brother telling me stories of all this and how he can feel the spirits come into him and the others as they present the dead animals to the spirits to save the dead animals’ souls wherever they may be – and how the spirits come through them and speak and act strangely while dancing around the fire. Not all my brothers were involved in this – only the fifth and the fourth and the third. My brother who was 12 was very quiet – me and him were the closest, he was too afraid of the spirits to join the group/clan which was called: The Kingdom of the High, but I was curious – I was not afraid.

So, when I was 10, almost 11 – my eldest brother returned from one of their worship evenings and he said to me that the spirits told everyone in the clan/group through him that they must bring me, because I am very important, I must be the princess of the clan/group and that I am here on earth for the spirits. That the spirits sent me here to earth for them, so that they may come to earth and save all the souls of the dead that already has died, especially the animals – because the animals were seen as the most holy of species on the earth – and when they for instance would find a dead dog in the streets which was thrown out and left for dead = such animals they would take and offer to the spirits.

I was very much excited, but my brother that came just before I did warned me, he did not want me to go – but I didn’t listen. I really adored my brothers as I always felt that they took care of me, they were always perfect around me and I felt as though they understood what I was feeling inside, especially when my mother died – because I felt alone, they took the feeling alone away because they spent so much time with me. I felt very sad and I missed her a lot, they took the feeling away when they made me laugh or played with me with my dolls or outside they’d have me play with them with the ball. They all became my mother and my father which I did not have anymore and which I did not know. I always felt safe and protected and I loved them with all my heart – during that time, I was an innocent girl, experiencing herself being enveloped with love and care after all that I had gone through with my mother dying – it was difficult to in some way comfort myself when she died, because I was initially scared to be left alone with my brothers only because they were always mean, angry, irritable and short-tempered, but they changed with me when my mother died – and everything was alright for about one year or two – until I joined their group / clan along with many others. Altogether there were nine in the group / clan – I was the youngest, the rest were all males.

So, the evening came when my brothers and I, the on that warned me was selected to the responsibility of watching over the house/home while we were away. The place of worship was behind an old building, about 45 minutes walk away from where we stayed, far away from civilization, behind a hill. When we arrived, the fire was already burning and the other people were already there – there was a stack of dead animals by the fire. I remember seeing two dead dogs, a rat, three dead cats, part of a cow it seemed, even little creatures such as beetles and lizards – the smell was awful. There was a wide circle made around the fire, in the lining of the circle they placed white flowers. My eldest brother made me a dress from a white sheet and I had to walk barefoot to this particular place – my feet were hurting and bleeding because I walked into thorns and bumped my toes on rocks because it was dark – but my brothers told me that it’s part of initiating me into the circle of The Kingdom of the High and that they also had to walk their first walk barefoot.

Then there were smaller circles around the bigger circle around the fire, those circles were also aligned with white flowers – these were the circles within which we were going to stand.

There was an old man there – he was sitting alone infront of a pot, brewing something which smelt almost as awful as the all the dead animals together – he had long grey hair, his face was wrinkly, his eyes seemed to be empty as though there was nothing behind his eyes looking through them: I remember thinking: He is a living ghost and I thought he was maybe one of the spirits here on earth.

I remember being honoured by being part of all this, and I vowed within me to not disappoint my brothers and neither the spirits. I felt very important. I felt special. I felt wanted. I felt a sense of belonging. I felt as though I have a purpose, a task in this world which is very important: And because of this – I was not afraid. I loved animals and it was very sad and heartbreaking for me about the way they died and I was very honoured to be able to send their souls to the spirits to take care of them and I knew I would feel special in doing so, because I would have wanted someone to do it for me – so I would give myself, my life to the animals and would do whatever necessary, for as long as I can – to take as many souls of the animals to the spirits. I loved animals and I knew they were being treated in this world as they shouldn’t be treated – I even felt this in my own life, that I nor anyone in this world should experience any pain, or sadness – so I hoped that if I worship the Spirits and please them – they would make my life better, maybe I could even take the pain and sadness from everyone in this world if the Spirits approve of me – because I am a princess of the Spirits and I will use what has been given to me to help as many people and animals from their suffering in this world. I was proud of my brothers, I was proud of them that they cared about the animals and I knew within me that because of this the Spirits was good also and that’s also why I did not have any fear inside me.

My eldest brother said to me that I must walk up to the old man and kneel before him. So I did – I was extremely nervous because I wanted to do everything perfect. As I approached the old mad, he took a knife – I remember his breathing being loud and heavy and his hands were shaking a bit. He took the knife, lifted his pants up from his left leg which exposed his left thigh and there were many cut marks on his leg – almost so much that there were only contours of cuts seen on his leg – I was from nervous to frightened. He took the knife and he cut his leg – I wanted to tear my eyes away, but my eyes were fixed on the entire procedure of him cutting his leg and see the blood dripping from it – it was one deep cut. He sucked the blood from his leg and waved at me to come forward, so I stood up from my kneeling position and went to him – he kissed me with his blood soaked lips on the forehead, cheeks, neck and the centre of my chest area. He said to me that he carries the blood of the Spirits and he has blessed me with the blood of the spirits. It made sense to me – so I was alright with it. He then gave me a wooden cup of the brew he was making in the pot and he said to me to drink it – it was the drink of the earth, from the earth – so when I drink from the earth, of the earth – I am belonging to the earth, blessed by the blood of the spirits and so I would be the servant of the spirits of the earth and travel amongst and be protected within the Circle of the Kingdom of the High. And so I drank the brew – after I drank the whole cup – everyone else around us started celebrating and I felt very weary, because everything I was seeing around me started meshing together into one – I did not see the individual shapes around me like you normally do – It was like seeing a painting of a house and trees around it clearly with a fire burning and lots of people around it, but then all the colors and shapes of the painting started meshing into one another. I just saw colours all around me and people around me vaguely, very vaguely – but I felt wonderful and I could just feel myself smiling all the time: Free is the word. I felt someone take my hand, it felt like my brothers’ and he said: You’re one of us now, you belong to the spirits – and so we danced around the fire, we threw the dead animals into the fire and I could actually see their trapped souls moving from within the carcasses going up, up, up – into the stars – they were in the stars! And I saw all sorts of white people behind all the other people as we were dancing, but they weren’t dancing with us – they were watching, and they had black eyes, but everything else was white. I wasn’t afraid.

When all the dead animals were thrown into the fire and we finished dancing – we all lay in a circle with our feet connected, watching the stars – the Kingdom of the High were in the stars where the spirits live – and that’s where we sent them I believed. I have never felt so happy.

My brother who stayed at home was very concerned when I shared with him what we were doing – he thought it was of evil. I was determined to have him know that it was good. We only did this once a week – the gathering took place once a week only.

So the following week we went again, I was only 11 years old at the time. Though this time I would find out from the Spirits what my task would be as the Princess of the spirits. When we gathered together, we all drank once more from the brew the old man prepared and I again had the experience of everything going hazy, yet experiencing myself quite wonderful. I did not then think it was the brew I was drinking – I believed that it was the Spirits that came into me and I was seeing through their eyes the world. My older brother walked up to me after he had gone to the hill to speak alone with the Spirits – he said to me that the Spirits told him that my first task was to take care of the old man for them – as he was very old and frail and he is one of their most cherished humans on earth – because he was the one who they appointed to start the Circle of the Kingdom of the High and it is a very special task to be done and the Spirits will be much pleased. I was afraid – to be alone with this old man, but I believed that the Spirits would take care of me and my brothers would protect me. So I agreed.

I continued to go to school still, always – never told anybody with what I was involved in. I took care of the old man for two years until I was thirteen – I read for him, I cooked for him, my brothers brought us food for a week and I took care of us. He told me many stories and I enjoyed him – he was like a grandfather to me. Until he one evening died – I only found out the next morning. So, my older brother was then selected to the leader for the Circle of the Kingdom of the High. Everything went fine for those years from about eleven to thirteen – but when I turned fourteen… everything started going very badly. Because in the gathering when my brother was to be the leader – I had to then take care of him alone and the two of us were to stay in the home where the old man lived. I was a servant of the Spirits and I was proud to be.

Though – when alone with my oldest brother – he said to me I must bare a child of the Spirits through him – that the child I will have will be of the Spirits and will be the first child into this world of the Spirits and so we will be the first to bring the Spirits into earth to help the animals and other human beings to show them how we must live – to stop the pain and suffering in this world.

I did not want to do it. I was very, very, very scared – but my brother was always so nice towards me and I vowed to do anything / everything possible to please the Spirits. So I did – but I told him only once. It was a very painful experience – he was very rough with me. Not gentle as I experienced him to be when he speaks to me or plays with me or help me with my school work. All in the family had a place to work so we did earn just enough money to take care of ourselves.

I just said to myself that it’s okay – I’m doing this for the animals, for the people suffering and in pain. But then, after that, my brother continued to come into my room some evenings and I could smell that he was drunk – I tried to kick him out of my bed and say to him: No! But he was much stronger than me and he forced me down, sometimes hit me, he even hit me so hard that I’d be unconscious and when I wake up, find blood on the sheets because he had sex with me so hard that I started to bleed. This continued for about three weeks – and we still went to gatherings every week and I remained with my brother. I prayed to the Spirits to protect me and wondered why they’re not protecting me and why they’re having my brother do this to me, I am in pain and I am suffering. How can I help the other people and the animals if I am in pain and suffering? So I went to speak to my older brother and he said to me that the Spirits made him this way so I can understand what pain and suffering the world feel to understand it, to understand them and only when they are satisfied that I understand pain and suffering will they have my brother stop being who they made him to be to prepare me to also become the leader of the Circle of the Kingdom of the High.

I did not expect this. I thought I was here to help the Spirits stop the pain and suffering – not have me also go through this. I felt sorry for my brother; because I thought it must be difficult for him also – because the Spirits was asking much of us. But I did it. He hit me, threw me around the house, hurt me by having sex with me – I at a stage felt like I was breaking inside me. I hid all the bruises when going to school. When I was 17 – all these years I continued to experience as much pain and suffering unto myself as possible so that the Spirits can say that I have had enough – but it never happened. I, when I was 17 – had difficulty walking – my muscles were painful and I had sores on my body. I finished school and everything. I continued the gatherings – but even then I stopped seeing the animal’s souls’ going into the stars – I just saw the animals burning, drinking the brew – dancing. But all that I held onto is that when this is done, I will finally be able to help the way I wanted to the animals and the humans on earth to stop the suffering. I could not speak to anyone about my experiences – because I swore an oath unto the Spirits that I will not speak a word of the most important task appointed to me. Of having a child of the Spirits and the Spirits having to turn my brother into what he had become to prepare me for my task in this world for the Spirits. And the oath was that I would be burned alive as with the animals and cast my soul unto them in the Stars so as to receive my due punishment if I were to utter one word to anyone. So I stayed away from as many people as possible – even also all my brothers. The one brother who was concerned for me always left – the one I also held most dearly.

I didn’t experience me as having a family any longer: All my other brothers were on their own way concerned with only themselves, all I knew what existed is me being prepared by the Spirits, by continuously experiencing suffering and pain through my brother – for three to four years I was inflicted with pain, shouting, cursing, hitting – treated as though I was nothing, dirt, filth, worthless – I even looked it. I was in a horrible condition. But I swallowed everything in, I embraced the pain and suffering inflicted on me by my brother – as much as I could absorb I did, to the point as I say where I could barely walk properly, I was thin and underfed. I within me wondered how on earth I could still be alive because there was nothing more left within me, but this tight experience of anger, sadness, resentment by doing nothing to protect myself against my brother, but lying there open arms always inviting in as much infliction of pain and suffering I am able to handle. I believed that it was the strength of the Spirits within me keeping me alive because I could not see any other way for me being alive.

I often went alone unto the hills and prayed for the Spirits – I exposed my bruises unto the heavens, the stars, cried out my tears of pain, of sadness – I did not dare express anger towards them, only unto myself – I did it all to myself – hoping the Spirits would stop what I’m experiencing. I could not imagine that human beings and animals were enduring so much suffering and pain as I have. But I did not know and I believed the Spirits knew best. I grew up with the Spirits, the Circle of the Kingdom of the High – it was my life – therefore I did what I had done.

I only became pregnant with a child of the Spirits when I was eighteen. I informed my brother and I remember how happy he was. He said finally – now the Spirits will lay us to rest and we may continue with our task. I was relieved and grateful for the both of us when I experienced me being pregnant – because I knew it was a sign of the Spirits saying to me that I had had enough pain and suffering and that I now understand the pain and suffering of human beings and the animals and I am prepared and ready to finally fulfill my task of freeing human beings, the world and the animals from the suffering.

But I strongly doubted if I would be able to carry a child in my condition and I informed my brother of my concern – I was abused extensively for three to four years, even breathing had become painful. So he then took care of me properly – my brother I knew had returned, transformed – and only on that, I knew everything was worth it. I never again walked properly, nor walked without pain – I had to use a stick of sorts to help me walk. During the time I was pregnant with the child my brother took care of me wonderfully – I hadn’t felt so healthy and whole within me for a long time. I did not attend any of the gatherings while I was pregnant – I remember crying a lot, but from gratefulness and thanks to the Spirits and that I did not doubt them.

Then a tremendous shock: I started experiencing much pain when I was four months about into the pregnancy. I started becoming ill. My brother brought one of the other member’s mother’s to come and have a look as she was known to be a healer of special medicines of the earth. She said she could feel the baby is in much pain and agony which is why I was in much pain and agony. She used all sorts of healing methods on me for four to five days – I was alone with her in the room, very, very, very ill, much fever – I remember always feeling wet, cold, shivering – it felt like eternity. I even believed I spoke to my mother while in the state, she was there with me, holding my hand – I believed this also to be the Spirits helping me to get through this. But then, on the sixth day – there was blood coming out of me, much blood – and the woman screamed. Then, the baby came out – but dead, I pushed it out, as though I was pushing out something that wasn’t supposed to be in my body.

My brother came in along with other members of the Circle of the Kingdom of the High – he looked at me, he had tears in his eyes and he said to me: You had failed us, you had failed the spirits. I could see the disappointment in his eyes – all the other members walked out, the woman attended to me, cleared the blood, washed me as though I was her own daughter and stayed with me throughout the night. The following day I was left alone in the house within tremendous pain and I still very much experienced myself being very ill. I crept in and out of consciousness – the woman still only came in the evenings to attend to me and I only could get up on my feet two weeks later. I had not seen my brother since the moment he had said to me that I had failed him and the Spirits – the woman did not want to let me know of anything with regards to how my brother was doing.

When I finally could get up on my feet I one evening set out to join the gathering. I did not know whether I should go or not, I was experiencing immense fear and uncertainty. All members were there – but there was a new girl, she was the same age as me when I started joining the gathering and she was also in a white dress, but a beautiful white dress, not as the white sheet I was wearing. My brother saw me – he yelled for me stop and not come any closer. I stopped – I had such a fright because I could just hear his anger and disgust within his voice when he yelled for me to stop and not come any closer. So I stopped, immediately – I had to talk to him, I had to understand what is going on – because it’s been only through him that I hear the Spirits speak to me, I have tried to speak to them, but I only got answers through events / signs not actual speaking. He looked me in the eyes and he said: I have said to you, you have failed us and you have failed the spirits. You can be grateful the Spirits still spared your life – you did not die. Be grateful that you’re still living – your life has only been spared because you remained loyal to the Spirits – but because the child died, you are no longer the Princess of the Spirits, you cannot be, the child couldn’t make it inside you. They have appointed another – there she is. Anger, no, rage, consumed me – I yelled to the skies: I gave up my life for this task which you appointed to me – you know what I have been through for you. This is my task to set the people and the animals free from their pain and suffering – I know what pain and suffering is! My brother took me by the shoulders and said: You have failed – you are not strong enough. You cannot be here anymore – we are done with you, the spirits are done with you – the new Princess to fulfill your task is already here, her preparation has already begun – it is done. Go now and do with yourself what you will – be grateful to the spirits that they have spared your life! My brother said to me that the Spirits told him to search for the new Princess as I have failed and that I must go in gratefulness – for the gift I have received from them for being loyal to them for so long is sparing my life, to live my life here as I please – as well as that I understand now what suffering and pain the world endures.

I was angry, no words could lay my experience within me to rest. I ran – I ran towards all the other members of the gathering, aiming for the girl – IT WAS MY TASK, I do not accept that it is over – I did not go through all that pain and suffering for nothing  – I have a purpose to fulfill. Though, before I could get to her – all the other members caught me and carried me far away from the gathering and threw me down onto the ground, into the dirt – exactly as I experienced myself within me: Dirty, filthy, worthless – exactly as I experienced myself through all those years of what the Spirits did to me through him. All my brothers said to me that they cannot anymore associate themselves with me anymore because the spirits had left me – they said to me that’s why my other brother left, because the spirits didn’t recognize him to be one of the Circle of the Kingdom of the High. My brothers said to me that if they were to see me ever again – they will burn me alive.

Something was wrong…

They cannot be good if they would send me through all that pain and suffering and then just leave me alone. The Spirits are evil – this is what I now experienced of them. They are evil because they transform people into monsters and then they abuse innocent beings as I once was. I believed that they possessed people and made them monsters and then play with us because they have fun of doing it – they had fun watching me suffer and be in pain – this cannot be good! I was so stupid, so naïve to believe it – pain and suffering is not good – I would never have or want anyone to experience what I have – so how can the Spirits be good if they did this unto me and now leave me alone – with nothing and no-one, only the clothes I wear is what I have with nowhere to go. I lay there as I got spat on and kicked – my brother said to me as they were doing this that they must to prove to the spirits their loyalty to the spirits that they will not ever see me again or help me again – but ban me – I am no longer worthy of being in the presence of those of the Spirits. I did not cry – I could not cry, I was quiet within me all the way through as I lay there – everything of me was gone within me, there was nothing left of me within me – it was taken and ripped out from within me – the Spirits have taken me – I am empty and I am nothing: This was my experience. I just felt like a body being kicked and spat on – nothing more, nothing less. There was just nothing – the depth of despair was so great that the feeling thereof was as though there was nothing: I lost everything – I lost me – I was gone…

I was left there – again bleeding and bruised, by dress torn, barefoot I was laying there in the fetal position, the cold breeze of the night blowing on my open soars, my breath. That’s all I felt, my breath, my body on the soft ground of the earth, my body bruises hurting, the wind blowing on my open sores, blood trickling down my body. My hair blowing over my face – sand on my lips, in my throat – I was cold. I did not care – I just lay there. Not even the desire of wanting to die was within me – there was just NOTHING. I decided to stay there and sleep, and if I wake up the following morning I will stand up…

I woke up the following morning, cold – my body was badly bruised, my muscles tense. I first got up with my arms – I really had to force myself up – it was very difficult, as though I was standing up for the first time in my life. I got up to my knees, and I looked around – deserted – I was alone. This I experienced when I was nineteen. I had difficulty getting up, but I got up – my entire body in immense pain – I got quite a beating. I had no reason for getting up, for standing up – I just said to myself the previous evening that if I were awake the following morning I would stand up – and so I did – I just stood up. I did not have a reason, nor a purpose to stand up, to force myself to stand up – I just did. I then decided to look for my brother, to search for him, the one I had not seen in years – maybe he could help me.

I did not know anyone at the time except for those who were in the Circle of the Kingdom of the High – I had to look for help, for someone to help me. I yelled into the skies that morning and said: I am here day and night –you are not here day and night – you are here only in the night. I curse you, I condemn you, I hate you – I vow to me myself that I will expose you, your evil, your deception which you flounder to others in this world – you are the one’s responsible for the pain and suffering in this world – you are doing this to the animals and human beings and you are doing nothing to help them. You are causing the suffering and pain – you the one’s that hide in the night. You cannot even kill me without doing it through someone, you are weak – I am not afraid of you! I live!

And this gave me courage – immense courage within me when I stood up to the Spirits – when I realised that I am not afraid of them anymore because I know that they cannot touch me, but through others.

So I went into town. It took me two hours to walk instead of 45 minutes. No-one wanted to help me, I knocked on doors for someone to help me, but the doors were shut in my face because they said to me they will not have evil in their homes and they were scared of me because of what I looked like, they thought I had a disease because of all the burn marks I had on me also which looked like sores of an disease, they thought I was a beggar on the streets, no-one recognized me because I hadn’t been in town in years. I went to the healer that was there – no-one was home. There was a city nearby, but it was more than half a days’ travel to there – and I thought that maybe my brother went there. All I could do was walk as is – maybe, maybe someone will take a moment and help me…

I walked out of town, slowly but surely, one step at a time, barefoot with a torn dress – I was hungry, I was tired, I was sore, I was in pain – every step was painful, but the pain started going away as I continued to walk – walking towards the city in hope of finding my brother. I stopped occasionally along the road for a moment to rest, it was a dirt road to town – we lived in the outstretches of the city. There was no-one and nothing on the road – I was alone. But I knew I could do it – because I have gone through years of pain and suffering – if I could get through that, I can most certainly do this.

So I continued walking, as I’ve said, one step at a time, one foot infront of the other until I collapsed. I do not know how long I lay there, but when I woke up it had started to become evening. I lay there for a while when I was awake and then I stood up again and continued to walk with great difficulty – I did sometimes wonder whether I would make it…

From behind me I heard horses coming – finally someone on the way to the city, I stood there and waited for them to pass me by. It was a woman with her husband and child on their way into the city – I looked very young then, they stopped for me and one couldn’t see so clearly in the evening as to what I looked like. The husband asked me what I am doing in the middle of nowhere and I told them that I was attacked by men and I desperately require getting to a healer or doctor. The woman had taken a blanket and she seemed very concerned for me – she placed the blanket over me and I lay down at the back of the cart. We reached the city much later in the evening. I refer to it as a city because it was much larger, civilized and bigger than the town from which we came.

We stopped at a home, the woman walked out into the house and informed another man of my situation. They took me into the home from the back – the two men had to carry me in, my legs just couldn’t move, they wouldn’t move. When I was in the light of the house – the woman and husband saw what condition I was actually in and had quite a fright to say the least. They left in a hurry and I was placed within a bathtub without water – just put in there. Two other woman came with white clothes and they bathed me with gloves, standing quite a foot away. They took care of my sores, I had food to eat and I remember falling asleep in the most comfortable bed and I drifted away.

I woke up two days later I found out. The man who was the caretaker of the home – he works with emergency cases he informed me, so he works in the evenings only. He asked me what had happened to me and I had told him what I have shared with you in this document so far and that I am here to find my brother. And he said the daftest thing: ‘Quite a story for a girl coming from the streets, you’ve got quite an imagination young lady.’ He reported me to an ‘official officer’, because he did not know what else to do with me, who came to get me and I was place into a cell within which I stayed for three days. I’d say he was more afraid of me because he knew nothing about me and was scared that I’d steal something from his home.

I pleaded for them to find my brother and I informed them where they’re able to catch those that gather in the meetings in the evenings once a week: But they did not want to believe me, they thought ‘the streets got to me’. They did not even believe where I told them I came from – based on the ridiculousness of my experience I shared. They searched for my brother as I had asked and they actually found him. He came to get me. He had done quite well for himself, he had a fine suit, with a fine hat, fine shoes – and he walked me to his home. It was a little apartment. He did not speak to me – I wanted to hug him the first moment I saw him, I for a first time, in a long time experienced warmth within me, but he just turned around. I didn’t blame him, I was not angry – I understood. When we came into his apartment – I fell down on my knees and I cried, and I cried and I cried and he came to me and placed his arms around me and held me until I stopped. He made me tea and he sat me down and that’s when I told him everything of what happened over the years since I last saw him.

At first he shouted at me, he was angry with me, disappointed – I recognized all that he expressed in that moment as what I experienced towards me when I realised what I had done with the Spirits and how I could’ve been so stupid to believe it. But then, then he came to me and he said: It’s all right, you’re okay now. I once again felt safe, protected and that evening I again slept well and comfortably.

When I woke up the following morning – my brother introduced me to a preacher. I had no idea of what ‘God’ was or ‘Jesus’ was or what a ‘Preacher’ was. Before the preacher talked to me, my brother sat me down and he said to me that he had found his saviour: Jesus Christ of God and it saved his life. There was a book on the table – called: Bible. He briefly explained to me what he believed in and he said he wouldn’t be where he is now, who he is now without Jesus in his heart and he believes that there exists a God who watches over us all and holds all in ‘His’ heart. Within me I had one thought: More Spirit lies. I did not want to have anything to do with Spirits and this ‘God’ he spoke of sounded very much like a Spirit. I listened to what the preacher had to say – that I am able to save myself from burning in hell with the Devil and go to heaven if I but allow Jesus into my heart, read the Bible, pray to God and go to church always and ask Jesus / God to forgive me for my sins. I was speechless.

After the preacher left – my brother said: Let God, let Jesus into your heart, pray for forgiveness for all your sins – cast out the evil inside you and have Jesus save you, then you, when you die, and I when I die will go to heaven and be within God.

Within the anger I said to him: How can you believe this God is good, how can you believe that He watches over us – after all that I had told you of what had happened to me? His answer was simply: Because you had not yet let God/Jesus into your heart. I stood there in absolute disbelief – because this belief which he explained sounded no more different than what I believed with the Spirits. There is the same: Worship and prayer towards a Spirits of sorts – though the Spirits I believed in did not have a ‘Holy Book’ – so in some way this particular Spirit ‘God’ seemed to be making quite a popular name for itself – but for me, within me – this ‘God’ seemed no different than the Spirits I experienced, this ‘God’ / ‘Jesus’ also ‘needs someone to talk through’ as in the case with the preacher just as the Spirits talked through my brother: No different.

I spoke to my brother about the similarities of the Spirits and this God Spirit and that there is no difference whatsoever – it’s Spirits fooling around with us human beings, through other human beings, playing a deceptive game with us and enjoying our suffering and pain. He said to me: I thought you might react this way – come in men. And then two men burst into the room suddenly, I had not seen them before. They grabbed me by the arms and forced me to the floor and I was kicking and screaming and they threw me unto the floor. I yelled and I screamed and I said to my brother that the Spirits are fooling him, are playing with him – they want you to worship and pray to them and do their will and so they deceive you, they are the one’s doing the suffering and pain – nothing and no-one else. And that they can’t do anything to harm you but through someone else. The Preacher was suddenly there again. My brother held my feet to the ground, the two other men held my arms and the preacher was standing above me with a cross that was wet and the Bible in his left hand. He spoke a strange language, words that I didn’t understand. I screamed for my brother and I asked him what he’s doing to me and he said that the preacher is coming to cast the possession of evil from within me, because it’s the evil by which I am possessed that doesn’t want me to take Jesus/God into my heart, not me. He just kept saying: Accept Jesus, accept God – the other two men were praying for me silently mumbling words of prayer to God and Jesus. I just kept saying: You’re the one’s possessed – not me!!!

I had enough of screaming and kicking and yelling and struggling – so I just stopped and I breathed. When I stopped, everyone else stopped and stared at me and the preacher asked me: How do you feel my child? And I merely replied: I am fine, I’m feeling alright, I would just like to rest. So, they picked me up from the floor. The Preacher inspected me, looked within my eyes, made me make all sorts of sounds to hear my voice and he informed my brother: All is fine – it is done and if he experiences anything strange – he must call on them again. I deliberately took the Bible and went into the room and closed the door to have them think they had actually done something.

As I lay in bed – I thought the entire world was possessed by the Spirits – Spirits showing themselves in all sorts of different ways to deceive human beings, but they didn’t deceive me. I knew the truth. I then understood that it’s be the most impossible to task to have anyone listen to me – because the Spirits possessed them all and in that moment I felt alone, very much alone within this entire world as the only one knowing the deception of the Spirits within which human beings believed. I did not know what to do. I most certainly refuse to believe in any Spirit whatsoever and I knew that if I didn’t respond to my brother’s belief he would send those possessed men again to try and have me be possessed by the Spirits to worship and pray to them. I had nowhere else to go…

I lay there during the day until evening – my brother checked in now and then as I heard the door open, but I made as though I was asleep – I did not want to talk to him, I did not want to talk to anyone as I really believed that this whole world must already be possessed by these Spirits, the spirits own the world and they play and have fun with human beings suffering and pain: This I was certain of. So I started wondering about death from the perspective that: If everything else the Spirits told me about themselves and how I must live and do and be loyal unto them was a lie – then what about what will happen to me when I die. Because I most certainly understood they had no power here but through humans – and they deceive through what they say to humans and through humans – so, who says that they had not lied about heaven/hell or going to be with the spirits or when I die and I have not been loyal to the sprits they will condemn and punish me in death as I was told by my brother? I knew there must be Spirits of sorts – so I will still exist when I die. And in the moment it seemed a brilliant idea to remove myself from this world – maybe I would be able to do something on the other side and speak to humans here – maybe then they’ll hear me…

I wasn’t afraid at the time to remove myself from this world – not at all. Because I understood that here I had no chance and I don’t know what would happen to me if I simply refused to believe in the Spirits or give myself to them. I didn’t know anybody else, but from what I experienced thus far in my life – it seemed the entire world was governed by them. I didn’t want to exist in this Spirit possessed world within which they force me to give myself to them and worship, praise and pray to them to in such a way give them an opportunity to possess me. So I got up, very much determined – took a knife from the kitchen, went to my bed – and cut my wrists – very deeply to ensure the certainty of death. I remember the pain being so extensively intense, all the blood around me – and I feel unconscious, my last moment on earth. And I died.

When I died – I realised I was right, I still exist and I immediately set out for my brother, to go into him and talk to him. But, the moment I died – everything was white around me, as though I was enclosed in something. I still looked the same: Long brown curly hair with a white gown within which I died, though now without blood. Two men approached me. Two men with wings, with a bright golden and white light resonating from within them, golden brown straight hair, perfect features and also with white robes and I immediately within me knew: Spirits. I demanded from them that they show me the way back to earth where all the other humans exist and to not keep me here with them. They smiled and they said no: They will let me spend eternity with the Creator of All – earth and human beings is the Creators concern and not mine, I am now able to go and rest.

I laughed, I laughed and I laughed and I laughed. I refused to – I simply refused to, because this bloody Creator is probably ‘THE SPIRIT’ that is responsible for all the suffering and pain on this earth and that they just want me to go there so that I can shut up and forget what I had experienced here on earth, so that I can forget about what is being done unto human beings here on earth, that this Spirit is responsible for all the pain and suffering of everyone in this world. They just wanted to send me there so that I won’t speak to human beings on earth, so that they can find out the truth of what the bloody Spirits are doing to them. I couldn’t just go and apparently experience rest, bliss and peace when I know within me the truth of what is being done unto human beings on earth and what I experienced within me: The deceiver in this existence is that very Spirit and so were these two beings also servants of the Spirits, trying to manipulate me with bliss, peace and rest so that they can so control me to not speak out the truth to human beings on earth. I expressed this to them and they just looked at me straight in the eyes and said: You condemned yourself. And they left, they left me in that enclosure of white and that’s all I ever existed within and I couldn’t get out of it – because everywhere I ran to, or walked to, up down, left right, diagonally – was only white: With no-one and nothing around me. They came, they returned once in a while, asking me the same question – I’ll either remain in here alone or return to the Creator. They tried to manipulate me by saying – it’ll be better there than being here. What’s really the difference…etc. But I refused – I will not give myself to the Spirit or spirits or any spirit for that matter and they would not send be back to earth either. I knew I was no good where I was trapped within – but I would not, I would not give myself to the Spirits.

So I remained within the enclosure for many, many, many, many earth years until the dimensions started changing and I was ‘freed’ from this enclosure within which I was trapped and all being’s within the dimensional existence’s process started to where we are now: All within the dimensions assisting and supporting themselves to stand within and as oneness and equality as life – the exact same process to exist here on earth for each and every single individual human being on earth. Thus – all the ‘spirits’ that tried and attempted to control and deceive human beings no more exist as they did – as all such separation has stopped.

(To explain the entire process which I experienced within the interdimensional existence would take me books to write, thus I will now continued with what I have realised:)

Solbeena, I do understand your current experience of you. I as you as all human beings within this world as all dimensional beings who have been within this world have experienced some greatly horrific experiences within this world – most of them, almost unspeakable.

Being abused, manipulated, deceived, lied to – the experience thereof becoming so much – it’s as though you’re completely surrounded by it, always, no matter where you turn, as though you’re in it as it and you cannot get away from it – deception, lies, dishonesty, abuse, manipulation – to the point where you feel that you’re suffocating in it, and it seems there is no way out. The sadness, the anger, the pain, the suffering becomes so great one tends to wonder how one can possibly continue to exist in such a way…

I understand that you’re currently thinking that removing yourself from this world will solve all that you are experiencing within you and your world currently. That when you remove yourself from this world you’ll get away from the stalkers, your family, your whole world…but what you must hear Solbeena is that you may think/believe that it is your current situation as the stalkers, your family and your entire experience in this world that is the reason and cause of you wanting to remove yourself from this world…but it is not. You may think/believe that if you were to remove yourself from this world everything there inside you, you experience, all the pain and suffering, will just ago away and in the dimensions you will find rest and peace and everything will just go away…it will not and it is not so.

Solbeena – your experience of you will not change in the dimensions, because you currently think / believe that it is your situation / circumstance that is currently causing the experience within you, that the world has let you down, has left you, your family has let you down, has left you – but it is not so, this is not the truth.

The real situation is that you don’t want to live with yourself anymore – you feel broken, lost, worthless, alone, abused, bruised, torn within you – and you just want the pain and suffering to stop within you, and you think/believe that removing yourself from this world will be the solution to the pain and suffering you experience within you: It is not Solbeena – because now, each and every single human being that cross-over face all that they have accepted and allowed themselves to be and become within themselves – thus, just as you are experiencing you in this moment, you will experience the exact same within the dimensions and much more intense than what you’re ever able to imagine – because it’s not where you are in this world, nor what your current situation is in this world that is the ‘problem’ – the reason and cause for all your experiences within you is because of acceptance and allowance within you of you – nothing and no-one else is responsible.

Thus – now, each one will face their own self responsibility, face all that they have accepted and allowed within themselves – whether here on earth or in the dimensions: There is no escape from self and you will face this process of taking self responsibility for what you have accepted and allowed within you.

This is done so Solbeena – that each one must realise that each and every single one of us have been responsible for what we’ve done unto ourselves and others as ourselves within existence as what we’re currently experiencing ourselves to be: This is done through facing ourselves, facing all that we have become within ourselves and experience within ourselves, to stand up within ourselves and take self responsibility for ourselves to no more accept and allow anything less than who we are in every moment of breath, here. So that we may stop, so that we may stop all that we have become and experience within ourselves and to not ever again allow and accept such an existence again.

Removing yourself from this world is not an option, because you will not experience peace, you will not experience rest and you will not escape from all that you currently experience within you: It’s not how it works Solbeena. And I would most certainly suggest you don’t consider it – because you will then realise you made one huge mistake and that you still exist the exact same way you experienced yourself here on earth, no different, yet also more intense, and that you will in anyway have to go through processes, exactly as you would’ve here on earth – so, I suggest you apply you in this process here on earth, it is much simpler to do this process here on earth than within the dimensional existence.

So, Solbeena, I suggest you stand up within you here on earth.

I hear you, from the perspective that you have ‘tried’ to help yourself – but herein is already the problem, the problem is within the word ‘tried’. Which then actually means that you haven’t actually ever really assisted and supported yourself at all – you just continued to accept and allow the experience within you. Because the word ‘try’ is used when you have already given up on yourself and didn’t actually really stand up within you to really actually assist and support yourself effectively.

Solbeena, what I have realised in removing myself from this world is that I actually in truth was ‘looking for a solution somewhere out there outside of me’, hoping it would be in another place – and it wasn’t there where I thought/believed it to be when I removed myself from this world and that my situation in the dimensions was no different to what it would’ve been here on earth – actually it had become much worse (as seen in what I have shared).

I was so stupid to think / believe that I’d actually find a solution to the experience of me outside of me, somewhere else, separate from me – because the solution was always actually right here: ME. That it is me as who I am that matters, that makes the difference – not where I am, that I will not find the solution to what I experience by running away from it, because this is giving up – this is not self honestly taking self responsibility for me as who I am in facing all that I have accepted and allowed within me.

Solbeena, self honestly: You have not actually really taken self responsibility for you and assisted and supported you effectively within the current situation you experience yourself within. I would suggest you actually really stand up within you and take self responsibility for you as who you are. We have to start, Solbeena, we have to stop what has become of this world, we must stop what we have accepted and allowed within ourselves, we must stop what we have done unto ourselves and others as ourselves and this is not done by running away, giving up or removing you from this world – and the only place we’re able to start is here within ourselves in every moment of breath by standing up and taking self responsibility.

The greatest gift you’re able to give you is self forgiveness, where you give you to you. I suggest to really actually start applying self forgiveness for all that you experience within you. All the pain and suffering you experience within you: You apply self forgiveness for. I’d suggest you write down your experiences in detail – all that you experienced within you from the past to where you are now and as you write you apply self forgiveness. Because in such a way, through writing, you release everything within you by placing it in words before you – and together with this, actually really apply self forgiveness. This is the first step of standing up within you and taking self responsibility – by releasing everything within you through writing it down / typing and applying self forgiveness as you do so.

Then to in every moment of breath – not accept / allow your mind as thoughts/feelin­g/emotions to influence you within you, because have a look – it is in participating in all those thoughts/feelings and emotions within you that is causing the pain and suffering – and YOU and ONLY YOU through application of every moment of breath by stopping participation in the thoughts, feelings and emotion together with self forgiveness is able to stop what you are currently experiencing within you: Nothing and no-one else can do it for you, you must assist and support you.

Don’t accept / allow you to give up on yourself. Have a look at what you’re able to do within this world with which you’re able to assist and support you in terms of earning money and then maybe another place to stay, get out there and see what you’re able to do, look at all options that provide the ability for you to earn money, maybe even at the same time a place to stay – but you actually have to get up and do it for you – be the solution and direct you and the experience within your world in such a way within which you’re able to assist and support you effectively. And also within this assist and support you within practical application in not accepting / allowing anything less than who you are. You have to direct you and your world – do not wait for something to happen for you, direct you and your world in such a way sop you may assist and support you effectively as you assist and support you within this process.

If you require any further assistance with regards to self forgiveness: Let us know – we’re here to assist and support you.